update?

So this week was hellacious. By that, I mean, I walked about in the pouring rain Tuesday night after having a near breakdown. and that's when I said to myself myself, "Self, you are going to chill out. Take a chill pill, kick back, relax...or at least don't act like everything is life or death. Because, guess what... If things are messed up, it's not your fault... and even if they are your fault, it's not on purpose."

Now, that doesn't mean I'm not going to try my damndest (hello, I am Type A and grew up in the Bay Area), but I'm going to take a note from my more chill  Northern California counterparts. I may be in New York, but this whole "moving a mile a minute, holy shit, we're all going to fail because I didn't turn in that one piece of paper on time" mentality just ain't gonna fly. I can't handle that.

Because that is insane.

So I've been leaving the office before 8. That's still about 10 hours a day, but at least I'm leaving at a somewhat reasonable hour. And I'm eating lunch. And I'm cutting back on coffee. And listening to NPR again. And in general TRYING to not be completely insane. It's sort of working, but in my defense it hasn't even been a week.

And then last night I went and saw HAIR again, with a friend. It was awesome because she hadn't even heard the music before I dragged her butt to the show. It's closing sunday night, and while the new cast doesn't hold a candle to the original revival (oxymoron, much) cast, there are a few members who are pretty damn good.  I cried, like I always do, but it was nothing compared to when I saw it last time.   I love that show, for all of it's flaws, and just want to dramaturge the hell out of that thing.

(edit: Once again, I got hippies all up in my grill. Awesome)


This morning, in my continued attempt to achieve a state of peace despite my near manic mind, I went to yoga. Now I thought it would be the "ahhhh, chill out and achieve nirvana" yoga. No. It was the "owwwww,  have the nirvana beaten into you" style of yoga. But it was awesome. For once my mind only slightly wandered back to theatre, and instead I was too focused on the fact that I evidently hold all my stress in my hips, lower back, and shoulders... and that I have the flexibility of an 80 year old.

And nothing will end my day (what? it's only noon!) like a giant street fair outside my window and the US v Ghana game that I'm going to watch.

And just so everyone else can chill out, here's some super mellow tunes.


PS Cross your fingers I get my camera back tomorrow (ahem, Forrest, if you're reading this!)